On Nuance

May we all take our cues from Brother Tortoise in 2024. Art by Emily Reid

Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it.

-Helen Keller

Notions & Contemplations

Ready, Steady

I hate to start the year off on a sour note, friends, but it’s time to brace ourselves. Though I do not have the gift of foresight, I can promise you that 2024 is going to be a wild ride: another U.S. presidential campaign that ~99% of the country is dreading; roiling regional conflicts with grave, growing losses of human life; the unchecked rise of AI; and increasingly extreme temperatures–just to name a few of the unpleasant dynamics we’re facing. All of this occurring amidst a sorry state of public discourse in which we barely know how (or want) to talk about hard things together.

It’s this last piece that has been occupying my mind in recent weeks: the question of why we have such a hard time engaging with opposing opinions, especially when actual lives (present and future) hang in the balance. Though I am far from arriving at a complete answer, I reckon part of it has to do with our rhetorical abandonment of nuance in favor of generalizations and absolutes.

Some definitions:

Generalization: a general statement or concept obtained by inference from specific cases.

Absolute: a value or principle which is regarded as universally valid or which may be viewed without relation to other things.

Nuance: a subtle difference in or shade of meaning, expression, or sound.

Source: Oxford Languages

Simple Arguments for a Complicated World

Here’s the real problem: we live in an exceedingly complex time–and though the complexity is arguably of our own making, we have a hard time understanding it. Quite literally, our brains need to simplify and streamline the overwhelming amount of data we encounter every day. Unfortunately, our current information and media landscape has negatively reinforced the brain’s otherwise noble intention of simplification. Our modern process of digesting information, forming a perspective, and conveying our opinion goes something like this:

• We collect data from sources we trust, which often confirm our pre-existing biases→

• We make sweeping statements based on genuinely limited experience or data→

• We throw the full force of our identity and belief system behind our innately flawed argument→

• We feel offended by opposing [also innately flawed] perspectives and increasingly seek the comfort of like-minded humans →

• We repeat the process until the literal end of life as we know it. 😬

In our daily exchanges, this process often manifests in the form of powerful rhetorical devices, such as generalizations (e.g. “Dogs are smarter than cats”) and absolute statements (e.g. “Cats are evil”), neither of which allow for much appreciation of the actual variation in any given population (in this case, dogs and cats) or experiences (my negative interaction with a cat does not invalidate your positive one). When we generalize or deal in absolutes, we limit “the possibility of co-existing truths” and almost necessarily increase division.

This process seems to afflict, with few exceptions, all humans. I am not immune. You are [most likely] not immune. The vast majority of us are locked in a self-harming information diet that “results in two-dimensional thinking, where discourse is limited to extremes, stifling the exploration of alternative perspectives and missing the rich complexity that reality often holds.”

But wait! The Good News

So here we are, staring down the dark tunnel that is 2024, with our well-meaning brains actively working against our desire to solve problems together. The good news is that we do have the power to break free from faulty absolutes and distorted generalizations, and the antidote is a little thing called nuance.

Nuance is the tortoise to Absolute’s hare. It is the allowance for divergence; the expression of variance;  the hedge against certainty. It is the slowing down in our analysis; the modulation of our perspective; the appreciation of naturally-occurring discordance.

Nuance is also, in my humble opinion, the most misunderstood superpower in leadership and decision-making. Where some may interpret it as uncertainty, attentive listeners will hear in nuance an invitation, a curiosity, and a commitment to openness. The difference is subtle, but powerful–and it is available to us all.

Some Tips for Nuance

As each of us navigates the trials and tribulations of the year ahead, I encourage you to consider the nuance in what you are hearing–and what you are saying. When you hear or feel inclined to make statements starting with words like everyone, no one, all, none, always, never, or every, pause and consider their accuracy. Instead, try leaning into “hedge words” like sometimes, occasionally, or some people. Finally, remember that while generalizations and absolutes might convey confidence, “self-assurance doesn’t necessarily reflect skill” and the tortoise is eventually victorious over the hare.

Onward,

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On My Kindle + Feed + Calendar

Citizen Better. As certain as I am that 2024 is gonna be a helluva a year, I am also certain that it is also going to require each of us to step up our active citizenship game. Thankfully, we have the good counsel of KJ Kearney, a community organizer, founder of Black Food Fridays, and friend whose new PBS show highlights “the informal ways to be civically engaged in everyday life.” Check out the first episode (just under 11 minutes!) here.

Wading into the DEI Debate. Chances are you’ve noticed recent headlines about the field of “Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion,” or DEI, and how it is threatening an assortment of American values. Unfortunately, it is yet another national conversation dominated by absolutes and lacking in nuance. That’s why I appreciated this piece, by Dr. Caroline Elkins, Dr. Frances Frei, and Anne Morriss, which thoughtfully unpacks the evidence-based outcomes of effective DEI efforts. If we learn anything from this “fitful stage of our evolution” as a multi-racial, multi-ethnic democracy, I hope it is not that we need to abandon DEI efforts, but that we need to double down on programs that are constitutionally-sound, foster respectful discourse, and meaningfully welcome people from all walks of life.

For a New Beginning by John O’Donohue

In out-of-the-way places of the heart,

Where your thoughts never think to wander,

This beginning has been quietly forming,

Waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire,

Feeling the emptiness growing inside you,

Noticing how you willed yourself on,

Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watch you play with the seduction of safety

And the gray promises that sameness whispered,

Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,

Wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled,

And out you stepped onto new ground,

Your eyes young again with energy and dream,

A path of plenitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not yet clear

You can trust the promise of this opening;

Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning

That is at one with your life’s desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure;

Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;

Soon you will be home in a new rhythm,

For your soul senses the world that awaits you.

From To Bless the Space Between Us